Lights on or off?

MIMI

My opinion can be summed up in one sentence: Lights on, because I like looking at naked men. However, in the interest of debate and a more full introduction of myself to this blog, I will elaborate.
I admit, I could perhaps be more scrupulous when choosing the men I date/bring home. Sometimes they are not the smartest, or the best looking, or the suavest. I am not the first, nor will I be the last who wakes up with a headache (just kidding, I don't get hangovers) to look over and realize HOLY CRAP THAT MAN IS HAIRY! (true story). There is, however, something all the men who have the honor of wading through the mess that is my bedroom have in common... I wanted to see them naked. And honestly, I wanted them to see me naked. It's just part of the fun, whether I am dating someone or just hooking up (what? me? never!).
I enjoy seeing what I'm doing, and I assume/hope I am not entirely interchangeable to him. I see men clothed all the time- how am I going to properly fantasize about them later if they are just noncorporeal blobs to me? And If I'm wearing cute underwear or am really excited about my tan, turning off the lights is kind of a bummer.

That being said, I hadn't ever really given it much thought til this question was raised. There are benefits to lights out- there can be an intimacy to that, a freedom in the dark that you might not feel otherwise. It can make a questionable decision (what? me? never!) more fun, and a little dirtier. And sometimes, someone just turns the lights off. If I'm having fun I'm pretty cool with it either way, and if I'm not the lights aren't really going to change that.


AARON

I prefer the lights off, but I'm not quite sure why. Is it because I'm not sure if I want to see what I brought home from a dark bar after a few Long Islands? Is it because I worry she's thinking that about me?

More likely it’s for a few other reasons. First of all, your eyes are shut for the beginning portion anyways. Also when you’re done “playing”, who wants to get up to turn off the lights (since I don’t have a light switch next to my bed)? Don’t you want to just lie there? It just makes more sense for the lights to be off initially.

To elaborate on the lights being “off”; don’t imagine being in a pitch black room. That’s no fun. I mean, you have to see something to have some idea of what you’re doing! I need some light in the room either through a window or by at least by leaving the hallway light on. If neither of these options are available, the lights stays on.

On a different note, I assume a big reason people turn off the lights is to add to the “mood”; similar to people lighting candles. How often in movies do you see sex scenes with it as bright as day? Not often because it makes it “sexier” having all of the lights dimmed. Maybe it’s so you can use your imagination more. Who knows, but if it was as bright as day when Seth Rogan had his sex scene in Knocked Up, it would have been a significantly less enjoyable scene.

Either way, I usually like to start the next morning with a game of sorts I stole from the TV show Scrubs:

Elliott: Are you glad we did this?
J.D.: Well I don’t know I haven’t seen your body in the light yet.
*Pulls up sheets and looks her up and down*
J.D.: Yeeep.


DOROTHY

This question is a no-brainer for me. Keep the lights on! if I am attracted to a person, why would I not want to see their body? There are really only 2 reasons that I can imagine you would want the lights off: either you are not physically attracted to the person or you are self- conscious about your own physical flaws. I am going to address them one at a time.

1) Hooking up with someone who doesn't spark your fire: First of all, shame on you! I mean let me be the first to admit that I've done it. I think most of us have made some poor choices with our night goggles on. However, that doesn't mean that you should, and quite frankly, I think that once you've made your bed, then you need to sleep in it. Lights on. Eyes open.

2) Self- conscious about the patches of back hair regrowth after a "waxing party" gone horribly wrong: We all have things about our bodies that we don't love, and I get that some of us feel that we have more of them than others. However, I am huge fan of "What Not to Wear" and Stacey and Clinton's "learning to love your body" motto. I have found that if/when I am more comfortable in my own skin in the bright light of day, I am simply more attractive and vice versa.

So, in the spirit of appreciating and loving the human body, keep the lights on, folks.

If that argument's not convincing, just keep the light on so you don't roll over your partner's hair or accidentally french kiss his/her nose.


SPARKY

To the topic at hand… We are discussing how we feel about lights during romantic and sexual experiences. While I do not mind having sexual experiences in really dark places, I prefer the rooms to be slightly dark, but light enough that I can see the actual person. I’m usually not the type of person to just take home a random lady, thus my preference is to be able to see and thus enjoy the good looking lady that I’m about to have some loving with.

In the past, several people have told me that I’m picky when approaching ladies to seek out possible dates. I guess part of the reason is that I want to be able to fully enjoy the attractive features, which is not going to happen in complete darkness.

With that said, if the lights are not dimmed at all I would not have a problem with that either, who else out there likes to get some loving on in the mornings and daytime as well?

Until next time… SVM